SOMETIMES YOU MESS UP

by missfootloose on February 27, 2010 · 5 comments

in And So It Goes

In my post earlier today under the photo of my amorous Costa Rican couple, a line went missing:

In restaurants, parks and other public places you’ll find signs like this one. Amorous scenes forbidden. In other words, no smooching here!

I expect that many young people live at home with their parents, and the public expression of their galloping hormones was out of control and restaurant owners found it necessary to find ways to avoid having their tables being used as “parking” spaces.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

lakeviewer February 28, 2010 at 1:03 am

No smooching? Darn!

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Land of shimp March 2, 2010 at 6:02 pm

Well, on the bright side, at least they didn’t go for the more pornographic graphic ruling out what might follow the smooching!

I was just about to say that I don’t believe we have any particularly amusing signs around here, when I remembered all the ones in the mountains. The “Danger of Falling Rocks” sign is really enough to put the heart across you. It depicts, in cutout black on yellow, a car being squashed by a plummeting rock. These invariably appear on mountain passes, from which there is no escape. So you’ll be driving through the canyon, see the freaking sign, and instead of seeming like a warning, it seems like a foreshadowing of how you are most likely to die.

Be nice if they put them prior to the areas of no escape, eh? And then there are the mountain lion crossing signs, which thankfully don’t feature them absconding with a pet dog, or anything.

Then I’ve seen a couple of signs put up by desperate businesses or people that are worth mentioning. Ones where the people involved went to the trouble of purchasing a manufactured sign, making it look official, rather than having a hand-lettered one.

One was at a business that had a reserved parking lot for customers: Parking for ______ customers only. Violator will be towed, and then strapped to an ant hill, and their bones allowed to bleach in the sun (for real…and I can tell you, that thing worked, I was parking my car, read that, and then promptly went to park somewhere else…it was very easy to mistake that parking lot as public parking, but menace me with an ant hill and I’ll skip merrily off).

Then the other one was in Winter Park, Colorado. An area with lots of day skiers coming in, and shockingly few public restrooms. They also sort of roll up the sidewalks in terms of businesses shutting down. So if you are there at off hours at all (which many skiers are)…you could be a bit hosed if you need a restroom. As a result, many people pee on the trees, or behind anything that provides cover.

One day my husband, a man who is not a fan of holding his pee, was driving with me through Winter Park, announced the need for a reststop, couldn’t find a bathroom, and pulled into an apartment/condo building’s parking lot….where he proceeded to troop behind the building.

He was back very quickly, and I wondered if he’d encountered a bear back there. Instead he encountered a sign that said:

We Don’t Pee On Your House, Please Don’t Pee On Ours.

We eventually found an open gas station. For the record, my husband was not about to take a leak on the apartment building, he was nipping back into the trees to do so …but he figured they probably were sick of that view too!

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Land of shimp March 5, 2010 at 6:19 pm

Oh that sign should have definitely been followed by an Or Else type of graphic. Namely some fellow doubled over, clutching his groin, with action indicators around the lady’s foot 🙂

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